Spindly with graceless steps, pointed toes, stretching limbs as far as possible, rushing to get off the street, hoping these sentient buildings (it's in your head, dear) would stop with their imposing posture. Maybe the beginning of capture – "we snack on Marfan". Maybe a respectful, welcoming gesture – "we mean you no harm as we mean nothing". Her mind flutters with questions: "Is it a greeting or am I for eating?"
[tags art, drawing, watercolor, form, woman, nude, figure, illustration, painting, macabre, anxiety]
I have nothing of interest going on so I wanted to tell you about something/someone that interests me…
A few months back I met Courtney, of Wonderful Little Things. I was on Craigslist hunting for the perfect seating to use in my home studio and she was selling this attractive, simple daybed that I just had to get my grubby mitts on. Which I did. In the process I not only gained some seriously kick ass seating, but also met a fellow creative cat and that just bumped the whole deal up to Awesome.
Courtney has an Etsy shop featuring several of her hand-painted ceramic dishes (multi-purpose – what!), a couple hand painted wood frames, and a hand painted pendant. The point is everything is hand-painted. My favorite bit is not only are the paintings free hand, but they have a mehndi look to them and, really, when does that ever go wrong in home décor? It doesn't, that's when.
Because I can be somewhat of a tightwad, I enjoy reasonably priced…everything. Her items are really reasonably priced (possibly under, in my opinion). The bases are structurally unique on their own, so having ornate designs well placed on top really makes for attractive pieces.
Earlier this year, Courtney began collaborating with Green Market Girl on Eco Cuffs. Courtney's designs appear in the Muse collection and adorn these eco-friendly, attractive, and well priced wrist cuffs. Love it!
So, while you're surfing the webs, hop over to each link I posted and see what's up – I kinda, sorta think you're going to dig what you see…
[tags handmade, small business, business, decoration, decor, jewelry, bracelets, eco, paint, design, art, green, mehndi]
Now that I've said all that, I decided that it would be appropriate to write an entry about the death of Whitney Houston. I've never owned an album of hers, but I remember hearing her music while growing up. I also remember hearing about her issues with drugs and relationships. Since this is an art-related blog and Whitney Houston was a musical artist, I figured it was relevant.
Beyond her music or personal issues, I know nothing of her. I don't know what/if she did anything to help other people, I don't know what her interests were, or what causes or issues touched her heart. I know that at one point she was placed on this fantastic pedestal to eventually be yanked off of it once her flaws out shined her voice.
It should be of no surprise that since her death, that negativity continues: Crack-this-that-jokes, "She deserved to die", "I'm glad she's dead", etc... that is what I've been reading on FB, Twitter, and various other places online. I don't understand the point.
She was a celebrity, but she was a human one. Just as real as you or I, simply playing on a different stage. Long ago I realized that celebrities are portrayed as cheap products that function poorly, are given horrible reviews, yet people keep buying them. There are expectations set for them that don't make sense, nor would I wish them upon anyone. I don't think I could handle feeling relatively secure as a person and, as soon as I make a mistake or do something that is seen as a mistake, everyone tears me apart as if I was less than human. In fact, this did happen to me, and I'm a nobody – it was awful to deal with. There are always understanding voices trying to shout over the mob, but they're drowned out by venomous comments, teasing, and bullying. Whether you're a celebrity, public figure, or average Joe, this happens. Of course, with people in the public eye, it happens on a vastly larger scale than in a small town. It doesn't mean it hurts any less, though. Truthfully it seems like cruelty, not love, knows no bounds.
Was I incredibly saddened to hear she died? Honestly, no. I think any death is sad, some more than others. I felt bad for her family, as I would with anyone that lost someone. I don't think the world lost a hero, I don't think her death will spark a revolution or a create major shift in anything (with the exception of her family). She was another person that, throughout her life succumbed to various things that affect people, eventually died for whatever reason, and that is sad. Of course, to her massive amount of fans, it's probably a tragedy, and that's okay too. Sometimes I think fans create this sort of familial relationship, so when the center of that family dies, they all take it hard. I'm sure that if Steve Martin goes before I do, I will feel very sad. I felt shocked and sad when Michael Jackson died, not because he was a performer, but because of what I knew about his upbringing and every event that followed him throughout his life. I feel deeply sad when I hear of a soldier dying, even though in order to hear about those deaths, you have to sift through a lot of other stuff...
Death is an incredible occurrence that can shake foundations and traumatize anyone. So is cruelty. Combining the two will never lead to anything good. For the ones being unkind to the ones receiving it – nothing good, no one benefits. I know I'm not alone in my thinking, but I often feel like I'm trying to shout over the mob.
[tags death, life, celebrity, celebrities, whitney houston, whitney, society, sadness, anger, hatred, gossip, kindness, hope, words, voice]
Has gone the way of The Fiction Project.
This is Procrastinator 2: (Putting Off) Judgment Day. In this version, everyone (including Terminators) plops down on the sofa and nothing gets accomplished because they're too busy watching American Dad and eating hummus with crackers. No one dies and Linda Hamilton doesn't develop arms that could break Chuck Norris in two. Nope.
I should now tell you that I started writing this post on Saturday (2 days ago). On Saturday I was under the impression that my Sketchbook Project had to be post-marked by January 21st. Clearly I missed that, so I did what I typically do every time I feel defeated: I give up and internally give my self a "talking-to" about why I suck and how I need to take a course on the Meaning of Time and How it Works, or something like that.
Pouting, I opened Opera and headed over to the Art House Co-op to check out the other artists and see what was going on with them, and pout some more. When I did that, I saw a date: January 31st! I realized that I originally misread it (I do this frequently - numbers don't look like they're supposed to in my head) and I still had time!!!! Yesterday, I whipped out a bunch of drawings that don't make one bit of sense and finished the Sketchbook Project. Today I put the book in a bubble sleeve, weighed it, slathered it with stamps, and shoved it in the mail-hole. Fingers crossed that the postage on USPS is correct!
Woohoo! This might be the first time I have completed something within the time frame I am given! I would celebrate, but I have to go watch It's Always Sunny so I'll celebrate later...
I'm seriously, you guys.
I've noticed how lax I've been in updating my blog. I'm not sure what the deal is, but I'm looking into remedying it. I write out a list of possible posts and then don't get to them or, I see them, but don't remember what I was going to say. I figured that today I would write about a recurring issue I have that sort of ties into my work: My name. Yes, my name is an issue.
I have gone through more casual name changes than I want to admit. I've changed for a variety of reasons: paranoia, boredom, spelling problems, anger/spite, and simply not feeling right about my name.
I have only gone through 1 legal name change: I was adopted. I went through several years of one easy-to-spell surname and then it changed to a rather fantastic, albeit hard to spell/pronounce, surname. Like old songs or movies, names can be triggers to past memories, good or bad. My last name made me think of bad things, so I wanted to change it. My first name did the same, so I wanted to get rid of that too. And then it started.
In high school, I toyed with the spelling of my first name. I was usually called "Jenni", so I continually changed the spelling of that until one day my Federal Government teacher pronounced my newly spelled "Jenee" as "Juh-NEE". I knew I had a problem.
Early adulthood I signed my work with a symbol that I still use once in a while. I refused to sign my name because I still couldn't accept it.
Then, as mentioned in the Explanation section of my blog, I went through several years of being ridiculously crazy and became obsessed with changing my name. I continually changed my online usernames or created new ones because I was scared that I would be found. Now when I see those names they seem so foreign - I don't even recognize some of them.
Last year I created a whole new name: Morgan Dreag. I love the name Morgan. I think the letter "M" is beautiful, I have a massive connection to the sea, and I think Morgan sounds like such a strong name. I needed some strength. And "Dreag"...well, I kept that part. I like writing it. I believe it's Old English for "apparition" and since I had spent most of my life feeling like I was a ghost, I thought it was suitable.
I used Morgan for a while. I look like a Morgan, so it seemed pretty natural. The family and friends I chose to tell about the name assured me that they wouldn't say anything because they understood my fear of being found (it's not a completely irrational fear...just mostly). Unfortunately, someone did mention it to another person and that name lost its power for me. The illusion of strength and protection was gone. The name hunt resumed...
Trying to find a name that not only fit me, but also matched my work was becoming a hassle. Here I had the documents ready to start the legal change - I just needed a name to put on them! I tried various names on, typed them out in different fonts, wrote them out by hand, entered them on forms, signed quick drawings with them; all to see how they looked and felt when doing that. Still, nothing.
I went back to look at my real name. My surname is relatively unique, so I don't have the problem of being lost in a list, but it also makes me easy to find for those that know the name. During my name-hunt, I went through countless name meaning sites and books, typing and looking up each name that popped in my head. Of course I repeatedly researched "Jennifer". In doing this I found that "Jennifer" also has connections to water and apparitions. For reals. Once again I already had something I wanted, I just needed to go the l o n g way to figure that out (can you tell that this happens a LOT?).
I'm sure that eventually I will, once more, become bored with my name or if I become mentally unwell again, I will feel the need to change everything, but I have a feeling by posting all these things that I've rarely said out loud, it will allow me to be okay with keeping what I got.
There is also the possibility of hitting the "Publish" button and eventually seeing a shadowy figure standing outside my window...
